#mistreat them. there are certain vulnerabilities that make me worry the most for them. Ive been writing under the deal breakers like exampl
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uter-us ¡ 8 months ago
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radfem help !!
2 of my little cousins (14yrs and 15yrs) are both girls dating boys right now, and together we are coming up with a "dealbreaker list" of things they will never put up with from their bfs! and also we are including positives, like so they aren't just looking for the absence of bad things, but actual positive things
what do yall think are the most important things to add? (i put extra info in tags)
Thank you so much!!!
#I dont want it just to be “he doesn't hit me” as that's super important but they could end up with awful boys who don't hit them and still#mistreat them. there are certain vulnerabilities that make me worry the most for them. Ive been writing under the deal breakers like exampl#of how it would manifest like things they might say or how they might behave so that way in the moment there will hopefully not be as much#time spent questioning if it counts as a deal breaker. we want to do positives too so like I said in the post it's not just like "he doesn'#put me down“ but also ”he roots for me and encourages me and verbalizes it“.#they are 14/15 so I'm less focused on stuff related to like splitting domestic labor for example but I think a good translation could#be like “he spends as much time as I do planning dates” and “it's clear to me that he put a lot of thought into my birthday gift” or the li#anyway I know they are safer without dating boys (and for the record they both know I do not date men (and only one knows I am SSA) but#they ARE dating and it's much more practical and realistic to reduce harm here since they are doing it!#also this is obviously not the extent of my effort in making sure they are safe and well and not reliant on boys/men;#this list is just one small part!!!#thanks so so much! and if you don't know please share bc maybe someone else has advice! ty!!!#radfem#radical feminist safe#radblr#sex based oppression#mvawg#question tag
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